I'm Getting Remarried...
...I just don't know how to break the news to my current wife, or the new one!
Like me, Jeff Bezos is a bald middle aged man. Unlike me, he is weighed down by being the richest man in the world. Before his soon to be ex wife MacKenzie downloads Tinder or Bumble I want to put it out there that I have been on the journey with them for the last few years as a loyal Prime customer and therefore am partly responsible for 50% of the $137bn she will shortly be awarded by a divorce court.
I'm just as bald as Jeff but just $137bn poorer, so just like Jeff, before the money complicated things.
Basically, I'm the ideal next husband for MacKenzie, so if you are reading this MacKenzie, I'm your man and I will happily forego a prenup!
(Apologies to the current Mrs.Sacks if she is reading this however.)